Top Three Skills Post
Communication
Communication is absolutely key in every aspect of life. I firmly believe that a person’s success in work or in personal relationships comes with their ability to communicate effectively. You won’t have a good relationship with your boss if you don’t communicate and likewise, you won’t have a good relationship with a spouse without stellar communication. Communicating and then allowing people to see the actions you have communicated builds trust.
I have been exposed to a myriad of ways to build my communication skills. From a young child, my mother has had me memorizing famous speeches, scripture, etc. and then presenting them in front of crowds whether at church or various talent shows. When I say I memorized I don’t just mean I learned the words but rather I was pushed to evoke the passion of the words I was saying.
Also, I have worked on political campaigns since I was 14, I realize this a polarizing topic but you can’t deny the fact that politics is about communication. I couldn’t begin to tell you the thousands of doors I’ve knocked on in 3 different states and the tens of thousands of calls I’ve made over the years, all of these have been to people from all walks of life from all different stratospheres of socio-economic class and I learned how to communicate with them and get the information needed.
My last example will be in my care of an elderly gentleman suffering from the Alzheimer’s. This is an absolutely terrible disease which strips you of your ability to communicate and rationalize like and adult and sometimes even at all. I remember one incident where he was upset over some issue in his mind and we were out to a restaurant. Due to the disease, he would sometimes get so confused to where he would create a scene while we were out because he was so confused and didn’t know what was going on and the fact that his caregivers were trying to help him and keep him safe. He was on the brink of one of these episodes and I remember going into his realities with him and trying to convince him that everything was okay. When communicating with an individual in this state you have to be able to switch mid-sentence realities, persons, to reverse psychology and back again all within seconds and in the above instance, I was able to do that and reason with him and keep him calm so as to not create a scene while we were out.
Relationship Building
Hand in hand with communication comes relationships because communication is key to relationship building. Having been involved in politics, social marketing, 4-H, FFA, ministry, and caregiving I have seen the effects of being able to form good relationships and have heard them presented on time and time again.
When I was caregiving there was a Starbucks which was located right across from my client’s development and I would many times go there to work on my college homework while I waited to go to work. Through this, I came to know several of the baristas and one, in particular, I cultivated a relationship with. Through communicating with him I knew he was studying to become and became a real-estate agent. He mentioned the fact that he would like some tips on how to dress as professional dress was not his forte and it was mine as I normally was in a collared shirt and many times a suit. I found out he was the same size shoe as me and as I was out shopping at a thrift store one day when I found a pair of cap-toed Johnston and Murphy’s which I purchased them for under $10. I took them to my friend the barista and it made such an impression that ever after that when he was there I never paid for a drink.
I love to frequent the same places so as to create relationships and it has saved me money many times like the above illustrated scenario. There was a particular restaurant that I liked to frequent and one time some friends and I were there and we had a gift and gave it to her. She liked it so much that I later got her several more, they were themed socks and therefore nothing extravagant. After that, there were several instances where she wouldn’t charge me for drinks and sometimes not a person at my table was charged for drinks.
Attention to Detail
In communicating attention to detail is key to building the best relationships. If you’ve noticed I’ve attempted to build on each skill set because that’s the way I think you use each of them. In relationships, the most memorable occasions are many times because you paid attention to a detail that you then centered an event around. Attention to detail to me is about noticing the things people enjoy, like and want and then looking for opportunities to give those things to them. It could be as simple as noticing the type of love they like to receive, whether its quality time, gifts etc.
If I had never spent the time communicating with my friend the barista at Starbucks I would never have known his shoe size, if I hadn’t bought that pair of shoes he wouldn’t have been so touched and given me the reward of free drinks. If I didn’t pay attention to what people wanted when I was out canvassing with a survey then I wouldn’t have gotten as many responses as I did. There were times when people didn’t want to take a survey but when I framed it as wanting to know what they thought on a particular subject they would answer because everyone wants their voice to be heard.