What Can I Learn?

When face with hardship, struggle and criticism, what is our reaction? Do we let it hurt our feelings, put us down and trample us? Or do we allow it to mold and shape the individuals we are and are trying to be?

            In this life, there are times that terrible things happen or maybe it’s just an uncomfortable situation. Whenever something terrible happens our reaction is to run to God and ask Him “why God?” when I have learned that our reaction should be to ask”what can I learn from this?” We are so quick to assign the blame for a terrible situation to someone else. To a Dr. that has just performed a surgery that hasn’t gone well, to a policeman who wasn’t able to stop a shooting, or to a fireman that wasn’t able to stop a fire. Thing is, it is easy to blame someone else for terrible situations, we’re human and many times the people that you feel whose fault it is are human too and never intended for a bad situation to come of it.

            Instead of always trying to assign blame to someone let’s realize that we do live in a fallen world where sin and suffering do exist. Remember, the only way that there is hope in this imperfect world is in the blood of Jesus Christ. Even aside from that fact I challenge you when a situation happens that leaves you asking “why?” Ask yourself “what can I learn from this?”

Let me tell you a story of a situation that happened to me. I was struck by a drunk driver from behind late at night on a highway a couple of years ago. When I got out of the car I looked at the damage and was immediately upset, this was my first brand new car and I had and was working so hard to pay for it. The lesson that struck me from that situation was that I had placed far too much importance on an earthly object that could be replaced. After the accident, I ended up with a car that was the same model as the one that had been hit and it had more features and a much better interest rate on my car loan.

Now I’m not saying every story will have a positive outcome like mine did, but my point is that you can learn things from terrible situations and they can make you a better person. You will never see yourself grow in character by blaming someone else, especially when the situation was out of their control as well. Life is a great teacher if we are willing to learn.

Shoot Straight

Getting straight to the point is something I have found as an asset. In a world where lies or dancing around what we really feel is the norm, let’s be different. I’ve trained people for multiple roles at various companies and I shoot straight with them about the job and my expectations. Today I was training someone new and I gave him a very clear picture of what I expected including but not limited to the limits of social conversation at this place of work. Maybe that sounds extreme, but it is better for me to lay out the playing field instead of making a call later that wouldn’t have had any precedent.

When individuals make mistakes, especially at work, they are always looking for a way out of it or they say, “it wasn’t me”. In my experience, going to the powers that be and admitting you were the one that made the mistake goes over far better and causes less overall stress than if someone doesn’t take immediate responsibility for the action. Donald Trump whether you agree with him or not said what the American people wanted to hear, and he was elected. When he spoke, he said things no one expected and some things, shouldn’t have been said the way they were but he didn’t hold back, and people liked that about him.

I want to run for office and Christians I know say that you can’t be a politician and a Christian, that they’re all crooked, even non-believers have expressed the same sentiments to me. I believe that people are hungry for the truth and if I am in the center of God’s will and telling the truth it will have a powerful connection with the people and Satan won’t be able to refute you because it’s the truth.

Walk!! Don't Run

This life is a marathon, it’s not a sprint. Seemingly we are all fighting to get to this mythical thing called the American dream. If we actually achieve the “American dream” do we just stop working? Stop living? Of course not, we keep living and working but what I’m getting at is more of a psychological mindset we have.

            Americans are working so that they can retire but after you retire that doesn’t mean you stop, you just find other things to occupy your time. I think that this concept especially applies to the walk of a Christian. It’s just that, a walk. sometimes we think that the gift of salvation means that we have arrived and that we no longer need to work on our relationship with God. That couldn’t be further from the truth. The Christian life is about walking side by side with God and learning from Him and His word and continually drawing closer to him.

            The same concept is apparent in marriage. Marriage takes work, you don’t go to sleep one day and then wake up and you’ve been married for fifty years. Yes, I believe fifty years of marriage is possible, both sets of grandparents made it to sixty as well as the gentleman I used to take care of. Marriage is hard work and a daily and continual choice, a marathon, not a sprint.

            The next time that you think that you’ve arrived just remember that it’s a stop on this journey called life. If you ever get to the place where you feel like you have arrived then stop, take an inventory of your goals and ambitions and set new ones if need be. Never stop, no matter what life throws at you, just keep walking, and don’t worry about running, WALK!

Shoes and Coffee

Take time for people. The best lesson I’ve learned is to stop and take time for people. From the beginning of time, God wanted us as humans to fellowship, that’s why he created Eve for Adam. God never meant for us to be alone, He wanted us to have the support of others in life. There is so much to be learned from others. So much value to be added to our life.

            I took an interest in a barista at Starbucks, his name was John. When I went to Starbucks, most of the time I was dressed up. I took time to talk to him and found out he was studying to take the real-estate agent test. He mentioned to me that I’d have to help him shop for dress clothes because that was not his thing. During the course of our chats, I discovered we had the same shoe size and I told him I’d keep an eye out for a pair of nice dress shoes. While my car was getting detailed one day I strolled by the nearby thrift shop and found a pair of lightly used Johnston and Murphy’s. Those shoes had been sitting there for several days and I asked the store associate if I could get a discount on them and she gave them to me for eight bucks. After getting the shoes I took them to John, he loved them and was so moved that every time after that I visited Starbucks and he was working I never paid for a drink.

            Now every story does not end like this, but I told you that story to illustrate the value of a simple conversation and caring about what’s going on in others’ lives. Take a minute, start a conversation with someone you don’t have to, you don’t know, there could be free coffee involved.

World Classroom

           One piece of real life school that people throw away many times is the ability to learn from circumstances and people around you. Watching and paying attention are I believe life’s greatest teachers. We often don’t pay attention, I think, because it doesn’t concern us or we’re too consumed in our own little world.

            Before I would ever go to a restaurant to work I would visit the establishment several times on my own time and just watch their processes. I would watch the attitudes of the employees, the way they seated people and the system they used, whether carried silverware to the table or whether it was already placed, how they take an order and even how they wipe down the tables just to name a few. My point in listing all of those is, you can learn a lot by just watching, no you may not learn all of the intricacies of the systems or methods but it would give you a solid foundation on which to build if you did work there.

            There are jobs I never have done and don’t plan to, but I still pay attention to what the individual is doing who is serving me, or if it’s not that type of establishment I just watch the operations people are performing. At my current place of employment, I have learned how to build something by someone else building one and then I was able to repeat it, just from watching and doing it with them. Now, none of this excuses the fact that you should always ask questions.

            Aside from work, you can be a better brother, a better son, a better daughter, and better sister, just by watching the way they do things. If you know how they like a certain thing by watching how they perform it themselves then you can show love and goodwill by doing it for them at other times.

            Another thing I do is play out scenarios of things that may happen to me or certain things I may have to do given a certain situation, and I develop a game plan and course of action in advance. Most of those things never happen but if they do my mind has a course of action to pull from. In the game of basketball, say you’ve never shot the ball before in your life, but you’ve seen others do it and you’ve thought about how you would do it when you get the chance to do it, you can make an informed attempt. That shot may be horrid but it was better than if someone handed you a ball you had never seen, on a court, you’ve never seen and asked you to do with that ball the appropriate action and you have no foreknowledge on what to do.

            My point is to pay attention, the world is truly our classroom. There will never be enough time to learn all of the skills that this world has to offer but you can be familiar with more of them if you’re paying attention. Don’t check out of this thing called life, that’ll lead to failure.

Vision

What do we see when we look around? Do we see potential, solutions and achievements or do we see problems, complaints, and failure? Just today I was asked to do something that couldn’t have been done if I didn’t have the vision to make it happen. You’re might laugh when you hear what it is. Well….. Here it is, at my current place of employment I work in the parts room, so a huge part of my job is organizing and putting away parts, as well as supplying the parts needed to manufacture our product. Today we were required to clear all of the parts out of one of the buildings at our plant.

            At first, when I saw the task it seemed a bit daunting and I wasn’t sure there was a way that it was going to be done in a neat and orderly way. One option was moving parts outside, but that’s somewhat impractical as it would mean the parts are exposed to the elements and it would have been a distance from where the parts may have been needed. So what was needed in this situation for a positive outcome? Vision. No this isn’t some monumental illustration or some really important task in the scheme of this world, but it still took vision to be able to keep most of the parts inside and to do it in a neat and orderly way.

            So many times in our life if we’d look past the initial shock of the task in front of us, we could see a way to accomplish it. But so many times we are blinded by the magnitude of the situation, or we just simply are not in the habit of looking for a viable and positive solution. Going back to a former blog post, it is a matter of perspective but perspective is merely the key which unlocks the way we see things. It is our job to train ourselves to unlock the doors, bull over the barriers and break the chains which encapsulate our vision so many times. We need to have trained ourselves to stop letting the initial shock of a dilemma or task overwhelm us and just progress one step at a time with an end goal in mind. Always know what you’re shooting for, then knock the targets down one by one.

Life Focuses: Business, Ministry, and Politics

Crazy right? Well that the reaction that I get the most when I tell people my life focuses. In the world we live in these are three of the most polarizing subjects. People align themselves with certain ideologies in all of these areas of life and in their minds many times their ideology is the only way to view that subject.

            To me, all of these focuses carry the same common denominator, people and building relationships. I love people, I love learning about the way individuals work and the way that they think and process things. In ministry, I can learn about people and offer them an eternal solution. In politics, I can learn about people and the issues that are important for them and advocate for them in the city, state, and even countries, governmental systems. In business, I can learn about people, their needs, and wants. Then I can satisfy them by either providing a product and service or offering them the means, in exchange for work, to live out their dreams.

            Is it crazy to pursue all of these at the same time or interchangeably with each other? Possibly. Remember my last post, it was about attitude and perspective. When you view things through my eyes with my perspective it doesn’t seem so crazy. Really it means that I can be a blessing to people always and in whatever state they may be in. When I meet individuals and they have a spiritual need, and I can lead them to the one who is the Lord of all and giver of salvation. If I meet someone and a governmental system has caused them undue stress or hardship, I can work on their behalf on that front. Then lastly, if people need the means to accomplish their own dreams and have the freedom to do that how they please, I can provide them with a track to get to the finish line.

            Really I’m a broker for freedom, I can lead you to the one who can free your heart from sin, I can work so that you’re free from the unnecessary confines of government, and I can provide you freedom from stress and worry about how you’re going to fund the life you live.

Check Your Oil--Attitude and Perspective

Where to start? Attitude is everything and I believe it goes hand in hand with perspective. Let me explain. Attitude is the way in which you go about something. It’s the oil which lubricates the motions of our existence. When we don’t have a pure oil coursing through the motions of life, things get gunked up and they often grind on causing damage to ourselves and others. But keep the gears well lubricated and the impact that we can be to those around us can literally be life changing. Then think about how you impacted them and because you had the right attitude, they’re impacting those around them too.

            Perspective, think of perspective as the buildup of gunk, it’s not in the well-oiled machine you call life, but rather you keep it on a shelf. Perceive things in a negative light and do not look at the positives, you are taking that can off of the shelf and pouring it into the oil of life. Some people keep pouring until their gears barely move and they just exist in a stagnant state of disrepair. They could get an oil change but they’re too comfortable with not moving, they’ve learned how to exist but they don’t realize that it’s all they’re doing.

            I challenge you, use clean oil. Keep your perspective real, but look at the best in situations and always come up with a solution to keep moving forward. Create a habit of filtering our oil, and keeping a clean perspective. If we learn how to run smoothly and efficiently with the oil God has blessed us with, then we will be able to impact our world by helping others filter their oil.

            Will your can of gunk stay on the shelf? Or will you allow it to be poured in to the motor of life? Will you keep your motor running efficiently so the impact on others is one of filtering? Or will you be the gunk which grinds gears to a stop?

Reformed Plan

While in Florida at Hobe Sound Bible College (HSBC), I was given the opportunity to care for an elderly gentleman the summer after my freshman year. Overall I had planned on staying for two years. Coming close to my third year of college I really wasn’t sure what way to go but I decided to stay thinking that was what God wanted me to do, and it was. I finished my four years at HSBC and graduated with my bachelors in ministerial studies.

            If I had never stayed in Florida and finished my degree I never would have had that feeling of starting something and then finishing it. I never would have had any experiences caregiving that I ended up having, some I’ll blog about tomorrow. I also never would have met the many people I now call some of my best friends.

            Yes, my plans had to be reformed, I still haven’t joined the military and think that I probably won’t. Not from a lack of patriotism because if we do go to war I’ll join in a heartbeat but rather my reasons for not joining is it’s no longer part of my purview. My goals and steps to reach those goals have been reformed and I’m perfectly okay with that.

            Now I’m involved in ministry at my church, I hope to start a church one day. Also, I get to live with my parents, not everyone has that opportunity, as frowned upon as it may be by society at times. I also get to participate and work in the program called Praxis which is the whole reason I type these words now. God has blessed me with a job that I get to provide value at, I get to work with friends and I have room for advancement.

            My plans still involve running for office, but I’m less stressed about deadlines to get everything done in and am ore content to wait and allow God to open the doors for me. Don’t panic if life isn’t exactly where you want it to be. Get up tomorrow, create a plan of action and then execute. You have the power over your own destiny and with the opportunities that this country and world houses the potential is endless. So breathe, plan, work, allow change to happen and just reform the plan, learn from the changes in plan and move on.

The Original Plan

           If you know anything about me at all you know I like to have a plan for how things are going to happen. Now, this doesn’t mean that I’m not spontaneous because I am but I formulate a plan on the go. My plan actually doesn’t always have to be followed perfectly but I like to know where I’m headed and what I may do along the way.

            My original plan when heading off to college was to go to Hobe Sound Bible College for a year, maybe two, then enlist in the military for a six to eight year stint and then once I was out run for a political office preferably a state senate seat and then start a business of my own. Sounds great right? The reason I wanted to go to Hobe Sound Bible College for a year or two was the fact that I’m a Christian and so everything I did in life I wanted to filter through a Christian worldview and what better place to get that than at the college my parents met at.

            I came down to the end of a year and then two years at HSBC and felt that God wanted me to stay. Oops? Scrap original plan? No, just reform it. If you’re reading this with a plan or semi plan of where you want to be or the things that you want to do. Don’t freak out when things don’t go according to plan, just reform the plan and keep on going. If you continue to read my blog, I’ll tell you how my plan has changed, in some ways drastically and in some ways not so much. I’ll also tell you about the way that God shaped me and gave me opportunities that I never would have imagined during my time in south Florida and now my home back in North Carolina.

Dress How You Want to be Accepted

This is a motto I’ve come to live by. It’s crazy to me how many people don’t even think about their appearance or if they do they have a very different philosophy. The thought I’ve always had rolling around in my head was; if a future employer walked into a room full of people and I was there would he choose me?

            For writing this post I did a little bit of research about first impressions and I found that our unconscious minds process way more than our conscious minds. So what I would take away from this is the dress for the occasion, if you are going to ride a horse at a ranch you will be automatically judged if you’re wearing a suit and tie. Likewise, if you go to interview for a job as a manager at a bank and you show up in cargo shorts and a character tee then you aren’t going to be as likely to be viewed favorably.

            In my own life, I have experienced how dressing well and learning how to communicate well with the people around you can leave a lasting impression and can lead to some awesome connections and also job opportunities. It’s not all about the way that you dress but it is also about the way in which we present ourselves. We as humans feed off of each other’s emotions. If you’re around a group of sad people is it easy to be happy? Of course not. Likewise, if you’re around a group of happy people that are loving is it easy to be angry? Of course not.

            When I think of this topic I think how it plays into the fields I want to appeal to and be a part of, fields like business and politics. The norm is to dress well in those fields and the norm for someone at the age of twenty two is not to wear a suit and tie unless required to. So if you wear a suit and tie when you’re not required too then your chances for appealing to people in those fields is higher. Dressing well usually affords yourself better service, if it’s coupled with a pleasant attitude and a smile. It’s not just about how you dress but how you wear it and act in it.

Focus

Focus

A simple topic with powerful results.

            Tonight I’m preparing for a message that I will preach tomorrow night, Sept. 2nd. In my personal devotions, I have been reading about the life of Samson and the author of the devotional I was reading, brought out some interesting points. So that is where I derived my topic for this blog post from and the theme for my message.

What can you accomplish without focus? Or maybe I should ask it this way, can you accomplish things of purpose without focus? No. Everything that we do in this life worth anything requires hard work and that hard work is a product of focus. Many times I don’t think we process what we are doing as a specific focus when indeed it is. Take a relationship for example, will we have a profitable relationship if we never focus on the other individual? Will we successfully navigate our vehicle from one point to another without focus? Can we succeed in our work environment without focus? The answer to all of these questions is a resounding no, of course not.

            Every action we make may not be a result of focus but when we are working on something specific many of our smallest actions are working synonymously with our focus to accomplish the goal we are attempting. The focus is seeing the light at the end of the tunnel and not stopping until we have done what we have to arrive at the light. In the story of Samson, God had a special plan for Samson and that was for Samson to help deliver the children of Israel from the Philistines. Throughout the story of Samson, we see how God works through him and gives him incredible strength but we also see his glaring weaknesses. We see him lose focus of the task at hand several times throughout the story depicted in Judges Chapters 13-16.

            Most of the distractions for Samson were in the form of a woman but there were also other things like anger and pride which got Samson to lose focus of the plan that God had for his life. I’m a firm believer that God has a plan for each of our lives. I also am a firm believer that there will be an infinite amount of distractions that will be thrown at us by the devil and life in general that will sidetrack us from the plan that God has for our lives. Even if you have no belief in God, you will still get distracted from what is important to you. This is why we have to focus, anything of consequence requires focus.

So FOCUS!!!

Breaking the Mold

            What does this mean for me? To me breaking the mold is simple in our current culture. Its being true to who you are and just practicing what used to be traditional principles. If you have the values that our grandparents lived by in generations past and apply them to the culture today you see a stark contrast. It’s not hard to break the mold!

            Breaking the mold is showing up 15 minutes early when everyone else is just on time. Breaking the mold is staying busy when everyone else is on their phones or conversing. Breaking the mold is finding things to do when there seems to be nothing. Breaking the mold is suggesting more efficient ideas to management when everyone else would rather not have their routines bothered. Breaking the mold is doing more than what is required of you. Breaking the mold is picking up that piece of trash that everyone else walked by in the bathroom or on the sidewalk. Breaking the mold is seeing someone else struggling and offering a helping hand. Breaking the mold is seeing the extra tasks that your boss has and asking if you could take one off of his plate or better yet, just doing it.

            See? My take on breaking the mold is simple. Do what no one else is, but don’t do it to get noticed, do it to make your company and the environment around you better. If several people started showing up 15 minutes early you might see more and more people follow you because by nature people are followers that don’t like to break comfort zones on their own. People will follow if they see the value in it, so do it and show them the value and then they’ll follow and even if they don’t, you broke the mold.

What the Module 2 Project Would/Will Look Like for Me

My project for the second module at this point is going to come from something that will both benefit my company and also my work through Praxis. That being stated I looked over the projects which were illustrated on the Praxis website and came up with several that looked interesting and if I didn’t have the opportunity to do my project at my current business partner I would choose one of these.

1.      Learn a popular email marketing tool like Mailchimp and create 5 explainer videos on how to make a drip campaign. To make it specific to a business partner, you can find out what email software any business uses by signing up for their mailing list. Their emails will usually list the software it was sent with.

2.      Sell something!  Make at least $100 in a month by selling anything to anyone…the harder the better.  Document your process.  Show how and why you can sell and what you learned.

3.      Make a few videos explaining sales concepts in detail and pointing out real-world examples of them.

4.      Write documentation for a business or organization you work with. Frame it as a value add: “Before I got here, everything was just institutional knowledge, making it very hard for new hires to learn on their own. Now we have documentation of processes, so a new person can come in and train themselves.”

5.      Document a process improvement you’ve made at a previous job: “We used to do A manually or through B process. It took C staff time. Then I came up with a new process – D. Now it only takes E staff time.”

The skill I would like to learn through doing my project in module two, is just to learn how to deliver. I am a very imaginative person and come up with ideas all of the time but learning how to write the out and deliver them is something that I struggle with. I hope by completing the project in module two I will be able to better deliver and articulate the projects which are trapped in my head just looking for a way out.

The fourth point in my idea of projects is along the lines of what I plan on doing for my module two project. Although the company I’m with is not a start-up company it really is. The company has grown drastically in the last few years and is still lacking much of the infrastructure that a company of its size should truly have. My project will be take one of those needed infrastructure pieces and finish it and then submit it to management.

The 5-Traits I Most Want to Improve On

            Listening and Empathy—I listed these together because those traits, at least in the way I want to display them go hand in hand. I can get ahead of myself when evaluating a situation and assume certain things about the individuals involved, sometimes being right and other times being wrong as I didn’t know all of the circumstances involved. Slowing down, listening, taking that extra second to evaluate and try to put myself in the shoes of the other individual would do me good in all areas of my life.

            Wisdom—To me this is again taking a little more time to look at a situation before coming to a conclusion and also having the awareness that things and people are not always the sum of their face value. Inherently I want to believe someone, especially if I like them when I rush to take everything they say at face value I may miss the bigger picture. This isn’t to say that I want to become skeptical of people or distrusting but rather to grow in wisdom and discernment when looking at a situation.

            Being Relational—Taking time for people is something that I’ve tried to do for many years but I want to become even better at it. I want to be so dedicated to people and learning about those around me that I rarely pass up an opportunity to be conversational. Overcoming the feelings of awkwardness in certain situations and just giving that simple “hello” or introducing myself.

            Calm—By nature I am not a calm person, now that is an asset when there is a lot of energy needed and things to be done that require it. Then there are the times that I am far too intense for the situation. When I don’t have control of a situation then I tend to get even more intense trying to reclaim control when in reality I should get calm, evaluate and then decide on the best course of action. Just realizing that being calm is strength many times would be a great help for me.

            Disciplined—In some things I am already disciplined but in the things that I can go without but would really be good for me I lack in the discipline to just get the done. Things like reading, writing, focused exercise and all of the little tasks I know would make me a better person but I’m doing okay without them, or at least that’s what I tell myself. I want to have the discipline to just get things done, not to think about them incessantly but to just make them happen.

How I Work

Location: Lexington, NC

Current gig: Parts Specialist and Management Trainee at Construction Implement Depot, Social Marketer at Youngevity.

Current mobile device: IPhone 8+ although overall I’m a Samsung fan.

Current computer: HP/Windows 10

One word that best describes how you work: Voraciously. I always feel like I become another person when I get in that work mode, my focus becomes better my speed becomes faster and I just work like there’s no tomorrow.

What apps/software/tools can’t you live without?

Contact Mapping—it’s a new app for me but it’s one that I’m rapidly trying to put into use. It was co-created by a social marketer and his son. Based on the same style the social marketer employed which was when he made a contact, anyone, whether it was specifically for business or not and find out as much in conversation as possible and then record it when he was done making the interaction. It’s a way to remember details about contacts that show people you care.

Evernote---it’s not a daily use for me but it’s a super nice app because you can record whatever you want in the app and then it’s super easy to edit and find the notes you need.

I don’t have a lot of super trendy apps that I use most of them are the normal social media apps.

What’s your workspace like?

It’s outside or in a warehouse type building for the most part. It’s not air-conditioned and is extremely loud. People scurry back and forth between tasks, there’s the glare of the welders and plasma tables and whirring and honking of the forklifts as they go from place to place.

My home workspace is a simple desk, the table, the couch, whatever I’m feeling at the certain time. 

What’s your best time-saving trick?

“Just do it” we generally waste oodles of time thinking and planning of how to do something instead of just getting started on it.

What’s your favorite to-do list manager?

As much as people say you shouldn’t it’s my mind or a small notepad. I like committing tasks to memory because it forces me to have good mental recall which is imperative to be in leadership because you’re thrown curve-balls all day long when you’re in leadership.

Besides your phone and computer, what gadget can’t you live without?

A good old-fashioned pen, you can impact the world with a pen and delivery source, paper, napkin, skin or whatever is handy.

What everyday thing are you better at than anyone else?

I'm a master at multi-tracking my mind. What do I mean by that? I'm glad you asked! This is different than multi-tasking. Multitasking can actually be inefficient because you're not giving your focus to one thing. Multi-tracking is the ability to seamlessly move from task to task and back again as the work and environment dictate. For example, you may be headed to do one thing at work when you're stopped and asked to do a more pressing task. It's easy to forget the first task but that's where the multi-tracking comes in. Being able to seamlessly move from task to task and back again as the situation and the things asked of you warrant.

What are you currently reading?

The Bible, The Last Safe Investment, and Derailed

What do you listen to while you work?

Music, mostly on shuffle don’t get too stuck on any one artist or genre. I also listen to some podcasts but the majority of the time I listen to nothing.

At home, if I’m typing something up I’ll listen to classical because it’s absent of words to distract me.

Are you more of an introvert or an extrovert?

Definitely an extrovert, I love making new connections and doing my very best to be an encouragement to the ones I do know and come into contact with every day.

What’s your sleep routine like?

Erratic, my whole life I’ve been a night owl but now getting up for work before 4 AM is forcing me to get into bed a little earlier or at least take a nap when I get home from work for several hours, get up and stay up late before getting up and doing it all over again after a couple more hours of sleep. Overall there is no set pattern. 

What’s the best advice you’ve ever received?

“Ask questions, it will compel people to answer.” One of the greatest gleaners of information is to ask questions and information turns into knowledge and knowledge into opportunities.

Is there anything else you’d like to add?

I’m adaptable whatever I need to do I will do. I don’t just mean that in the generic sense but rather I will transform into the person I need to be in order to accomplish the task before me to the absolute best of my ability.

Three Top Skills

Top Three Skills Post

Communication

            Communication is absolutely key in every aspect of life. I firmly believe that a person’s success in work or in personal relationships comes with their ability to communicate effectively. You won’t have a good relationship with your boss if you don’t communicate and likewise, you won’t have a good relationship with a spouse without stellar communication. Communicating and then allowing people to see the actions you have communicated builds trust.

            I have been exposed to a myriad of ways to build my communication skills. From a young child, my mother has had me memorizing famous speeches, scripture, etc. and then presenting them in front of crowds whether at church or various talent shows. When I say I memorized I don’t just mean I learned the words but rather I was pushed to evoke the passion of the words I was saying.

Also, I have worked on political campaigns since I was 14, I realize this a polarizing topic but you can’t deny the fact that politics is about communication. I couldn’t begin to tell you the thousands of doors I’ve knocked on in 3 different states and the tens of thousands of calls I’ve made over the years, all of these have been to people from all walks of life from all different stratospheres of socio-economic class and I learned how to communicate with them and get the information needed.

My last example will be in my care of an elderly gentleman suffering from the Alzheimer’s. This is an absolutely terrible disease which strips you of your ability to communicate and rationalize like and adult and sometimes even at all. I remember one incident where he was upset over some issue in his mind and we were out to a restaurant. Due to the disease, he would sometimes get so confused to where he would create a scene while we were out because he was so confused and didn’t know what was going on and the fact that his caregivers were trying to help him and keep him safe. He was on the brink of one of these episodes and I remember going into his realities with him and trying to convince him that everything was okay. When communicating with an individual in this state you have to be able to switch mid-sentence realities, persons, to reverse psychology and back again all within seconds and in the above instance, I was able to do that and reason with him and keep him calm so as to not create a scene while we were out.

Relationship Building

Hand in hand with communication comes relationships because communication is key to relationship building. Having been involved in politics, social marketing, 4-H, FFA, ministry, and caregiving I have seen the effects of being able to form good relationships and have heard them presented on time and time again.

When I was caregiving there was a Starbucks which was located right across from my client’s development and I would many times go there to work on my college homework while I waited to go to work. Through this, I came to know several of the baristas and one, in particular, I cultivated a relationship with. Through communicating with him I knew he was studying to become and became a real-estate agent. He mentioned the fact that he would like some tips on how to dress as professional dress was not his forte and it was mine as I normally was in a collared shirt and many times a suit. I found out he was the same size shoe as me and as I was out shopping at a thrift store one day when I found a pair of cap-toed Johnston and Murphy’s which I purchased them for under $10. I took them to my friend the barista and it made such an impression that ever after that when he was there I never paid for a drink.

I love to frequent the same places so as to create relationships and it has saved me money many times like the above illustrated scenario. There was a particular restaurant that I liked to frequent and one time some friends and I were there and we had a gift and gave it to her. She liked it so much that I later got her several more, they were themed socks and therefore nothing extravagant. After that, there were several instances where she wouldn’t charge me for drinks and sometimes not a person at my table was charged for drinks.

Attention to Detail

In communicating attention to detail is key to building the best relationships. If you’ve noticed I’ve attempted to build on each skill set because that’s the way I think you use each of them. In relationships, the most memorable occasions are many times because you paid attention to a detail that you then centered an event around. Attention to detail to me is about noticing the things people enjoy, like and want and then looking for opportunities to give those things to them. It could be as simple as noticing the type of love they like to receive, whether its quality time, gifts etc.

            If I had never spent the time communicating with my friend the barista at Starbucks I would never have known his shoe size, if I hadn’t bought that pair of shoes he wouldn’t have been so touched and given me the reward of free drinks. If I didn’t pay attention to what people wanted when I was out canvassing with a survey then I wouldn’t have gotten as many responses as I did. There were times when people didn’t want to take a survey but when I framed it as wanting to know what they thought on a particular subject they would answer because everyone wants their voice to be heard.